


talk me nerdy

by poketa



Category: Glee
Genre: F/F, anyway this is crack, au sex call worker, meet-cute? what about meet-fuck
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-25
Updated: 2020-08-25
Packaged: 2021-03-07 03:08:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,953
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26099926
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/poketa/pseuds/poketa
Summary: what's the possibility of meeting the same person twice?
Relationships: Rachel Berry/Quinn Fabray
Comments: 16
Kudos: 77





	talk me nerdy

**Author's Note:**

> this is a crack fic that just took form and needed to share with all of you? hope you like it! 
> 
> thanks emi for being a very good Beta and supporting me! you're the best wife ever.

* * *

_“Hey, there.”_

“Hello,” Rachel replies after a moment. Closing her eyes tightly as a tired smile appears on her lips “It's been a while, huh? How are you?”

There's a low laugh and then a reply from the other end.

_“Old same, just here, working day to day.”_

“Sounds... great,” The performer replies lamely, sitting back into her couch as her own day plays through her mind.

Rehearsals were painful, everyone seemed to be having a day off and it concluded with an incredibly stupid confrontation between the two other leads who ended up wounded after falling off the stage and needed to call their understudies for the day.

It was, _yeah_ , a horrific day.

“Mine sucked,” Rachel comments as a humorless laugh leaves her dry lips. “Like immensely royally _sucked,_ ” she adds, playing with her fringe as she talks, trying to not just pull the whole fistful of it out of frustration.

“ _Sounds like it,”_ comes the sympathetic reply and the brunette nods to no one as the silence settles for a long moment through the call. _“You know I can help you with that, right?”_ And the tone of her company lowers into something seductive, sultry, it tries to change the mood.

“And you _definitely_ know that _that_ isn't the reason why I call you,” Rachel replies as an involuntary less strained smile leaves her lips. “I do appreciate the effort, considering it's your job to _"satisfy"_ me, _Candy.”_

 _“It was worth the shot,”_ the woman, _Candy,_ accepts from the other end of the call. The brunette can hear the smile slip through the line, it certainly helps her mood. _“Get paid either way.”_

“Effectively,” Rachel assures as she drops her hair and instead uses her hand to touch her own cheek, closing her eyes once more. She thinks about the touch of another person on her skin. “Just like if you were giving me an orgasm.”

_“If only you would let me give you some pleasure, baby.”_

“Someday, maybe,” the performer says as she drops her fingers to her jeans and fists the hem of her loose-fit sweater. Her lip quirks as she glances towards the empty apartment. “Wanna tell me about your day, instead?”

There's a long pause before the reply comes.

_“Read another psychology paper for my thesis last night.”_

_Candy's_ voice has changed, no longer using her sexy sultry one, but a speaking voice that makes Rachel forget the nature of their link.

 _“Please_ tell me it is better than the _Jung_ one.”

 _“As if,”_ Candy dismisses with a scoff. Rachel chuckles at her bitterness, the woman is so frustrated with the lackluster search. _“No one can really do it like him.”_

And they easily fall into a dissection of Candy's readings for the next hour, Rachel forgets about her own sucky day and the minimal social interaction helps to break the frustration inside her body, ultimately lulling her to sleep.

 _"Goodnight, Baby."_ Is the last thing Rachel hears, before the call disconnects and her eyelids close.

* * *

  
  


Then it comes a good day that has Rachel feeling particularly happy as she relaxes, scented candles lighting her apartment.

_“Starting to miss me already?”_

“Hello, Candy, _”_ Rachel greets happily as the sip of red wine travels down her throat, warming up her body, she's lazily sitting in her bed as her sound system plays her _chill_ playlist. “How are you this fine night of April?” 

_“Someone's peppy tonight,”_ comes the low reply. The brunette lets the pleasing voice travel through her system with a hum as she closes her eyes, her lips perking with amusement.

“Roof above my head, a dream job in my hands, a promising career ahead of me,” the brunette explains easily and she isn't trying to be an egomaniac asshole, those are just facts and naming them is being realistic to herself, perhaps acknowledging how far her own effort has taken her in life. “Plus, a _beautiful_ woman paying attention to me at the other end of this call, why wouldn't I be happy?” 

_“You know how to talk a girl up, huh?”_

“Anyway, tell me about your day,” Rachel replies as she sips her wine again, a light blush rising up her cheeks as the temperature rises with the alcohol through her system.

 _“Well, I have found the last needed article for my thesis,”_ Candy laughs; it's easy, free, genuine and it makes Rachel smile widely as the emotion travels through the call. _“So, now I just got to write the last bit of it.”_

“That's amazing,” the performer admonishes as she rubs her cheek, shaking her head lightly. "I'm - does that mean that you're like…?" she trails off, her brow furrowed.

_"So close to that Master’s Degree diploma I can taste it? Yeah."_

And it's not her usual seductive voice, but nonetheless it makes Rachel squirm on her seat as she listens to the woman to speak about her academic background.

 _"Hopefully this will be the last one,"_ the woman comments, _"if we keep contact, please stop me from going for that Ph.D."_

"Don't know," Rachel hums thoughtfully as she taps her chin, her cup of wine resting by her thigh. "You are kind of sexy talking about psychology and human processing."

 _"You're the worst,"_ Candy comments. There's a brief giggle, it's both cute and attractive and it may be the wine as the performer teases the waters with a timid careful step.

"Yeah?" Rachel comments as she lifts the cup of wine, touching the glass to her lips lightly, the coldness a contrast to the hotness of her skin. "How bad... I am?" 

_"Oh?"_ the voice from the other end replies and it sounds surprised like she can't quite believe what she is hearing, and Rachel's heart races with uncertainty. _"Are we really doing this?"_

Rachel laughs it off, shaking her head to herself as her cheeks blush deeper.

"What? Talking to each other through the phone?" she asks, feeling disappointed at herself as she steps back from the cliff with the eyes closed, her heart clenched in her fist. "I hope so, or else I'm hallucinating and must need to visit a psychologist urgently."

There goes a long second of pure loud silence, but the breathing of the woman is still faintly there so the brunette keeps her ear pressed to the cell phone as she waits.

 _"Someday,"_ Candy replies and it sounds both like a threat and a _treat_ as Rachel swallows tightly. A cold shiver running down her spine, making her tingle with something. _"I'll make you come so good, baby, you'll be so damn satisfied to beg me for more."_

And the performer breathing hitches, her thighs pressing together as that voice goes straight down her body, caressing her inner walls to clench them with pleasure, but she just shakes her head at it, dismissing it.

"So, a Ph.D.? What can you even do with that? Like rule a little universe or something?" Rachel jokes as she shrugs off her own arousal, instantly moving to leave the cup of wine over the night table, opening her eyes to place it well onto the surface.

The empty and, otherwise from the music, silent apartment meets her senses and it stings harder than usual as the voice replies through the phone.

 _"Sometimes I wonder if you are joking or we just live way too different lives,"_ Candy teases. Rachel hugs herself, her eyes closing again as the voice sweeps through her ears, being like a hug to her lonely self. _"Anyway, a Ph.D.? It's useless, I'll tell you that."_

And that makes Rachel break into laughter.

  
  


* * *

_"Hello, baby."_

"Can I ask you something?" Rachel asks and she's having dinner by herself, the empty seat in front of her stings a little more than usual tonight as she plays with her spoon.

_"Direct to the point tonight, huh?"_

"Well, can I?" The performer inquires as doubt creeps into her system, making her clench the silver item into her hand tightly. "As friends?" 

_"Oh, we are friends?"_ Candy comments. She's not being mean; it sounds genuinely curious as the brunette laughs nervously. _"Good to know."_

"Don't be rude, I'm going through something, okay?" Rachel counters with a slight pout. She feels so small sitting there, staring at the empty seat, feeling helpless as her loneliness sweeps through her with a force that not even on high school was present. Perhaps then, at least, she had her parents. "So, can I?" 

_"I'll do my best to answer,"_ the woman replies and she sounds attentive, it makes the brunette briefly think about how much of a good professional _Candy_ will make once she completes the degree.

And Rachel internally scoffs at herself, only she would use a sex call center to get advice about her personal life.

"Do you think I'm pathetic for calling you instead of going out on dates and meeting new people?" she lets out slowly, her eyes tearing up as she does.

_"Wow, you're feeling particularly shitty tonight."_

"You have no idea," Rachel comments with a sniffle, moving her free hand to move away from the tears.

There's a short pause, Candy sighs deeply and then speaks.

 _"I don't think you're pathetic for resorting to a paid call service, baby,"_ she says sincerely. The performer knows it isn't the woman trying to secure more bucks to pay for college, Rachel really doesn't call her _that_ much. _"Humans don't have the same social skills nor use the same methods to communicate with others. Technology has both improved and fucked some aspects of communication, but on a short good answer, you aren't less of a person for this."_

 _"At least, I don't think you are,"_ Candy adds seemingly as an afterthought.

The caring words are absorbed by a still teary Rachel, who is softly smiling, eyes closed, trying to imagine the woman on the other side of the call, and some days, she swears that if she tries hard enough, she can see her sitting there with her.

"Thank you," Rachel replies with a teary chuckle as her heart beats a little quieter with those words, satisfied.

 _"So, we are kind of friends, huh?"_ Candy teases and it's both cute and kind of humiliating, but there is a point and they surpassed it after the third call when they started to talk about methods to clean wine stains from carpets and cheap underwear.

"Kind of," the brunette agrees with a bright smile, shaking her head to herself.

 _"Good,"_ the woman agrees from the other end of the call. _"Want me to get you off tonight, friend?"_ but her tone isn't seductive, just teasing.

"Shut up," Rachel scoffs, drying up her tears with her shirt, "and talk me dirty." 

_"Oh?"_

"Academically dirty," the brunette specifies.

_"Oh, baby you know what I like."_

And she may be staring at an empty seat, but there is a woman talking her ear off about psychology and any other company couldn't compare to this.

* * *

  
  


Opening night comes, everyone on the current cast becomes friends, and the curtains close with a tsunami of deafening applause.

The trip to the bar with the cast is both inevitable and obligatory.

It's not a hole on the wall, but neither one of the hottest clubs in Manhattan, but there's just something about the hustle of the place that makes every one of them agree to enter the place and settle to start to order and get ridiculously drunk.

Of course, Rachel is happy, _perhaps,_ elated, about the victory of their opening night, but there is something nagging at the back of her mind that can't make her enjoy the drinks with the freedom of everyone else around the table.

Her co-star, Eric, drinks so much, he starts to rap the opening number of the show and the rest joins him with made-up lyrics that don't make sense at all.

They are the attraction of the bar and as the night advances more and more people enter the establishment, filling it with more fresh faces.

Rachel is about to order herself another Raspberry Daiquiri when an intense gaze burns the side of her head and turning to the side, she comes face to face with who would be described as the most _beautiful_ woman she has seen in her entire life.

_"Hey."_

The music and drunk singing from her castmates make it difficult for her to focus on the voice of the blonde woman with the piercing gaze, but she still nods, smiling coyly back at her.

"Hey, back." 

The bartender takes her glass and Rachel briefly describes her order, before tuning the woman back in.

"Part of the _Broadway_ table?" the blonde comments, nodding to the direction of the table. Her smile is perfect, the kind that one sees in toothpaste commercials and Rachel nods, if not a little dazed by the alcohol and the presence of the beautiful woman.

"Yeah, we had our opening night, tonight," she comments with a proud little nod. The way the woman nods back, biting her lip, makes her draw a quick breath in before Rachel continues. "Actually, I'm one of the leads," the brunette gloats, feeling a little bold by the attention.

"Yeah?" the woman in the dark top and white skirt comments. Rachel isn't checking her out, but this woman truly is a masterpiece, it feels like going to the Guggenheim just standing there and staring at her. "I mean, you're gorgeous, but if you are a lead, then you must have a pretty amazing voice too." 

The bartender finally settles her drink in the bar and before she can pay it, the blonde is giving him a twenty, barely glancing his way as her eyes flirt with her again.

"There's no need to buy my drinks to flirt with me," Rachel comments as her cheeks are kissed by the heat that has attacked her by both the attention and the compliments her way, "But thanks."

"You're welcome," the blonde comments and she picks up her glass, it has an amber liquid and nothing else, but ice.

Of course, she is the sexiest woman Rachel has been in front of and her drink of choice is something just as sexy.

"I'm Rachel," the performer comments, sliding closer to the woman and normally she would offer a hand, but now it feels like if they touch, the place will burst into flames.

But the blonde goes for it, extending a graceful hand with pearly skin that takes Rachel's tan hand with her own and it feels electric as their palms touch, fingers gracing, gazes meeting in the middle.

It's a little explosion and they are just shaking hands.

"Nice to meet you, _Rachel,"_ the blonde breathes out.

  
  


* * *

Rejoining the cast table ends up being ditched as an option when the most attractive option looks at her with inquisitive eyes and quips witty comments about the people around the bar with ruby red lips. 

Two more daiquiris by the bar and Rachel is settled warmly next to the blonde, talking close to her.

 _"Quinn,"_ she exclaims with helpless giggles as she touches the arm poised around her waist. 

Slowly, daringly, _maybe,_ and there's something so familiar about _this,_ but Rachel can't quite point how it is possible when this dazzling woman has never been inside her life in any form.

The alcohol through her system doesn't help too much either, if anything, it makes her more of a helpless puddle as she laughs at the woman's comments.

"It's true, alright? CisWhite men can't handle powerful women," the blonde explains further, her brow furrowing. There's something so sexy about her focused gaze and professional words that Rachel finds herself nodding at whatever that comes out of those lips. "It's like if you dare to excel beyond them, their," she shows her pinky, "get _smaller."_

And Rachel laughs more, curling up against the arm around her, closing her eyes tightly as she nods.

 _"God,_ it's true, every male partner I've had hasn't been able to accept I'm more talented than them," she admonishes and she stops for a moment to gaze at the blonde woman who is looking at her rather attentively. "Do you think that makes me conceited? To believe I'm better than them?" 

"Well, are you?" Quinn inquires and it's not judging, it's sincere like she is truly wondering about her talent and the brunette licks her bottom lip. "Are you more talented than them?"

And the performer looks at her cast table, where they keep singing and making fools of themselves and thinks about the performance of tonight with as much critical thought as her drunk mind can manage.

"I'm sure of it," Rachel answers with finality and she glances back at the blonde, who smirks closely at her, her fingers drawing warm circles around her hip. "Does that make me an asshole?" 

"No," Quinn dismisses instantly. Her eyes are dark, alluring, reassuring and it's like everything that Rachel needs at the moment and _more_ as the blonde answers, "I think it's _sexy."_

And it's like a switch goes off somewhere on her mind as Rachel slides closer to the blonde, close until their noses are touching and their breathing is mingling between them, foreheads kissing on the heated atmosphere of the loud bar.

"I'm going to kiss you now," Rachel announces, eyes closed and heart hammering wild inside her chest and there's a quick nod of a nose against her own that makes her smile.

So, she goes for it, lips moving to push against awaiting ones and Quinn's mouth tastes hard like mints and whiskey, but her lips are so soft and delicious and Rachel goes further to keep kissing them as the blonde reciprocates the movement.

If shaking hands is fire, then kissing her is burning the whole bar down.

Arms hugging her waist move to round her frame and before she can't process what makes her mind do that, Rachel is moving apart, panting closely to the mouth that she just briefly had the pleasure to devour.

"What's wrong-?" The blonde whispers hurriedly against her mouth and her voice is low, rushed, like she is worried she had just committed a mistake.

But Rachel shakes her head, quickly pecking those lovely lips, before opening her eyes and gazing at fully dilated, but also worried hazel eyes.

It's a sight that makes the performer falter but understand herself a little more too.

 _"I'm_ \- I don't want to rush this," she confesses, looking between the two eyes intently and a slow smile appears in those intoxicating lips _; sexy_ , caring, understanding and the brunette feels the need to explain further even if Quinn seems to already understand her argument. "Call me crazy, but it feels like this could be good and I don't want to screw it up - going _too_ fast."

Quinn giggles; loudly, happily, charmingly, and her arm moves back until she has her hand where it was before they kissed on Rachel's body.

The blonde squeezes her hip briefly, before moving to peck her cheek and the bar is loud, but not too loud to not hear the words that the blonde woman pronounces by her ear.

"I don't think you're crazy, if anything, I'm crazy for believing it too." 

And the shiver that runs down her spine makes it all worth it as they fall back into easy conversation and a few lazy kisses shared in-between them that keeps the fire controllable.

* * *

  
  


By the end of the night, or the beginning of the morning, Rachel gets a cell phone number and a few more kisses by the sidewalk before jumping inside the Uber and being delivered to her home safe and sound.

The apartment may be empty of the presence of someone else, but life resonates with the promise of something as her iPhone vibrates by her pocket with a new incoming message.

_unknown number: text me when you get home xx_

She bites her lip, pushing the letters with a grin as the image of beautiful hazel eyes and daunting red lips replays through her mind.

_just got in. missing me already? xx_

Rachel discards her shoes by the door, hanging her summer jacket to go to the kitchen for a bottle of water and it can't be more than a minute before the next message from the blonde appears.

_quinn: like you wouldn't believe it. no one is judging ppl with me from the bar anymore :(_

It makes her giggle as she closes the door of the refrigerator and paddles to her bedroom with her bottle and an apple in tow.

Rachel settles against the cold sheets of the bed, not bothering to put any light on, just gazing at the screen with the light from the moon coming from the window and a smile onto her face.

_should I comment on how smart, but kinda mean you are?_

Taking a sip of water, Rachel closes her eyes, falling back to her pillows as her phone vibrates in her chest and she lifts it.

_quinn: ofc I am and you think is very sexy of me_

The brunette laughs loudly, happily, _freely._

_quinn: just like I think being confident and oh so talented is very sexy of you_

And the apartment may be empty, but her heart feels full as she replies back to the beautiful woman.

* * *

  
  


It's Sunday, the second day of texting Quinn back and forth when a sudden thought comes to her mind.

It's startling, worrying, and she waits for the right hour to make the call to sort the topic out.

_"Hey, babe, thought you had forgotten me."_

Candy's voice is just as sweet and soothing as always, but it sticks with guilt as Rachel thinks about the blonde and the kisses, jokes, and the potential date coming next week.

Her eyes close and the words come out in a rush.

"I meet someone," She starts and she can't stop once her mouth is open and the thoughts are out. "And she's like - I don't know how to describe her, _Candy,_ she is like the most beautiful, charming and intelligent woman I've ever met on my life." 

Rachel closes her mouth, playing with a sticky note as she waits and there's quiet silence before the response comes.

_"Well, babe I'm so glad for you."_

And Candy sounds happy for her making Rachel's lips break into a smile as she listens to the response.

_"See you could meet someone! but remember don't downplay yourself, she is just as lucky for finding you."_

"Oh, _shush,"_ the brunette says with a light blush to her cheeks as she plays with the script in front of her. "The thing is - I'm calling because I want to end our business relationship, Candy."

And the sharp silence is more than _cutting,_ it's deadly.

_"What?"_

"I mean," Rachel fixes in a hurry. "this is a sex call service and if I'm meeting someone I should come clean and be honest about this," she continues as the silence drags in, "and since we are more friends than whatnot, I thought we should exchange _real_ phone numbers to talk and maybe, someday, I don't know, like go out for drinks or something." 

_"Oh."_

Crap, crap, crap- 

_"Okay."_

"Okay?" Rachel repeats obtusely as she sighs. "You're cool with exchanging numbers?" 

_"Of course, I'm cool with it,"_ Candy counters with a laugh and the brunette exhales a relieved sigh as both share a laugh. _"There you made it sound like you were done with me for a second, babe."_

"Never," the performer quickly denies with a shake of her head, even if Candy can't see her. "That's just plain ridiculous, I like your company too much to let you go like that," Rachel adds as she thinks about their nights spent together talking.

_"I was a little shocked, not gonna lie."_

"C'mon, we are friends, aren't we?" Rachel counters back and she can hear the roll of eyes all the way down the call.

 _"Yes, I guess, we are,"_ Candy replies slowly and then adds on that sexy voice of hers. _"Guess that if you have your woman now, I'm not gonna make you come any sooner huh?"_

Rachel thinks about the immensely arousing voice, the charming wit, and the attractive intelligence that has drawn her for months - it reminds her too much of _Quinn_ and it feels a little too much like stepping into murky waters to compare both women.

 _"Mmmm,"_ the performer hums thoughtfully and she steps forward a little, just looking over the cliff, flirting with the possibility of more. "But I'm just talking with her, we don't know that _yet,"_ and it's both playful and a little serious as she thinks about hours spent on the phone talking with a woman she has never met before nor knows how she looks.

_"Then I'm still game for you, baby."_

Rachel bites her lip, closing her eyes feeling a little guilty, but squashing it under her finger as she speaks again.

"Just give me your number, you crazy woman."

 _"Demanding? Didn't know you had it in you,"_ Candy fires back and it's both flirty and a little teasing.

"I'm gonna hang up," The brunette threatens but without any real intention of doing so as she shakes her head, a smile in her face.

_"Okay, I'm gonna spell it now so pay attention with those lovely ears of you."_

And Rachel does closely, attentively pushing down the numbers that appear on the keyboard in her phone as the woman says the digits to her.

"Wait - _what?"_

_"Something's wrong, babe?"_

She blinks with confusion back to the screen of her phone.

"...Did you say _three?"_

_"Pretty sure I did, yeah,"_ Candy replies with a puzzled tone as the brunette pushes the _three_ on the screen, and her expression changes to relief.

"Okay, done, saved your number under _Candy,"_ Rachel admonishes as she turns off the speaker and moves the phone next to her ear again "Obviously, I know that's not your name, but knowing you, I bet you want me to earn your real one, correct?"

 _"God, you're so intelligent,"_ Candy replies with a fake moan down the line, _"it makes me so wet, baby."_

"Okay, I'm definitely hanging up now, _bye."_

And Rachel really cuts off the call, her cheeks flaring an inelegant blush as she shrugs off the embarrassment and immediately sends a message to the new saved number.

_I bet Freud would have a trip field analyzing you._

The reply comes almost as instantly.

_Candy: Fuck Freud and not in the good sense of the word ;)_

It makes the performer smile all the same as she replies.

_Is there a good sense of the word fuck?_

_Candy: oh babe, I assure you there IS ;*_

And it makes her feel if not a little strange, which is stupid, because Quinn and she aren't a thing, they are just talking, but talking to _Candy_ feels like a constant flirting and how is that she goes from _zero_ to _two_ woman interested on her in less than three days? 

_Well,_ Rachel can just accept her fate as her phone vibrates again,this time a different name appearing on her screen.

_Quinn: god, i miss kissing your lips_

_Quinn: also hello how are you gorgeous_

Her smile just about divides her face in two as she replies back to the blonde and she's single.

There's nothing wrong with this, right?

* * *

  
  


_Quinn: knock knock_

The performer rolls her eyes, before fetching the keys from the table as she walks up to the door and there stands in the other side of the threshold the stunning blonde on a patterned grey dress with ankle brown boots, a leather jacket over her torso, loose curls of blonde hair framing her beautiful face.

"Two quick questions, first, I hope that's faux leather," Rachel opens their interaction, crossing her arms over her chest as the blonde stares at her with a frown, but the brunette just continues "And two, isn't too hot for a leather jacket?" 

_"Hello Quinn, you look hot, wanna come inside my apartment?"_ the blonde mocks, but she has a smile, and then she's grinning as she backs her up against the door of her apartment, breath hitching as their noses touch. "First, that wasn't a question and yes, it is _fake,"_ Quinn counters as their breathing mingles.

"Good to know," Rachel comments breathlessly.

The blonde is trapping her to the door, she's glad her neighbors aren't walking by the hallway or it would be entirely too inappropriate for them as the performer decides to surge forward, wrapping her arms around her neck, kissing the blonde.

The memory from a few days ago pales in comparison as their mouths melt against each other, the door being an anchor to their passion. The blonde reciprocates her kiss, moving her lips thoroughly, sucking lightly on her bottom lip, before releasing it with a pop and the sounds wakes her up from the lust infused situation.

"Wait-" Rachel murmurs, putting a distance between their mouths as she pushes the woman away by her chest.

"What's wrong?" Quinn inquires with a chuckle, frown present over her stunning features, hands moving to rest against the brunette's hips.

"What about the second question?" the performer inquires playfully, plunging the neck of the jacket with her fingers.

Blonde polished and perfect brows raise.

"Because I look hot in it?"

"Okay, valid." 

And Rachel surges again to kiss her just because she can and she also missed kissing the blonde and her perfect exquisite lips that she can't stop meeting again and again.

"Not that I'm not enjoying _this,"_ Quinn whispers hotly against her mouth, her gaze dark, her voice low and there's a familiarity of it that makes her think briefly of _Candy,_ but Rachel pushes it away concentrating on the present as the blonde woman touches her bottom lip with her thumb, playing with it. "But we got a reservation." 

"Right," the performer accepts with a pout before she agrees to something inappropriate like going inside and forgetting their date.

So, Rachel pecks her lips, before agreeing. "Let's go."

* * *

The restaurant vibrates with customers to the rim, but the atmosphere is happy, charged with laughter and sounds of cutlery against plates.

"Maybe I'm just intelligent and I don't do anything beyond making fun of drunk people with gorgeous women," Quinn replies teasingly, sparing a crouton to move it inside her mouth and the action is both elegant and sexy, it makes Rachel feel if not a little inadequate looking at her just _eating._

"Okay, now give the real answer," the performer counters eating a piece of her own entree with an unimpressed smile. "I'll ask again - What is it that you do, Quinn?"

"Sadly? I'm _still a_ student," the blonde answers truthfully, rolling her eyes and it sounds familiar to her ears, it reminds of Candy and endless rants about how the educational system is _fucked_ , yet how addicted she is to knowledge. "Sometimes I do think I'll be always one and just stack one degree over the other until the day I die," Quinn comments with a bitter laugh, looking down at her plate.

"How... _Twilight_ of you," Rachel murmurs as a strange feeling settles on her stomach.

Candy and Quinn are _too_ alike… maybe Rachel has a _type._

"I'm a vampire, didn't tell you?" Quinn teases, her lips quirking sexily. It’s enough to distract her from comparing again both women, even if the voice is starting to even sound like the sex call workers to her ears. "You have to invite me in or I won't enter your apartment." 

"Assuming won't take you far," the brunette counters with a raised eyebrow as she tries to shrug off the discomfort traveling down her body. "What if I don't want to invite you?" Rachel counters easily.

"Mmmm, _well,"_ Quinn replies but her gaze is smug and her smile too as she points her fork at her. "Someone seemed pretty cozy by the door to say that now." 

And it's the reminder of their kisses that finally stops her from comparing both women.

" _Touché,"_ Rachel comments with a blush, sipping her wine, trying to keep her reaction mild.

But there's a knee touching her own under the table and Quinn is smirking at her.

" _Oh,_ yeah, I'll _touché."_

Luckily for her, her flirting is being mild if not dorky.

"That was awful," the brunette comments, giving her knee a quick squeeze, before moving to keep eating her food.

"Awful enough to get me to second base?" the blonde wonders and her cheeks are dusted with pink, she's not the evil seductress that her exterior would convince after a quick once over.

It makes Rachel grin.

Candy and Quinn _are not_ the same person.

"Maybe _third_ if you play your cards right," the performer confides with a wink, feeling bold. "Like telling me more about you?" she adds.

 _"Kinky,"_ the blonde student admonishes, she inhales deeply and then continues. "So, basically, born and raised in Connecticut, one older sister, divorced parents and I'm the human to a cat named Meatball," she says in one go, raising both of her brown at her, like asking if that's enough.

"Meatball?" Rachel asks with a raised brow.

"Long story short," Quinn clarifies with an embarrassed smile, like she's not totally fine with sharing that much about her personal life and the similarities keep appearing even as Rachel tries to stop noticing them, _Candy_ has never mentioned something about her personal life.

"We call him _meaty_ because he's basically obese," the blonde continues with a chuckle.

And Rachel can't help it and asks, _"We?"_

"We adopted him, me and my roommate, Tina," Quinn answers, and her smile is sunny, but clipped like she's at her limit of sharing about herself.

The brunette decides to move the focus away from the visibly uncomfortable woman.

"I've never had a pet in my whole life," Rachel comments with a shrug and the blonde's expression moves into complete shock as she speaks. "It has never called my attention to have one if I'm being honest," the brunette adds nonchalantly as she puts another bite into her mouth 

A beat passes.

"Wow," Quinn comments. She looks a little insulted by her claims but also relaxed, and perhaps it was right to move the attention away with that. "Not sure if I want second base now." 

Rachel pouts at her and the blonde breaks her expression to laugh, the meal moving now onto the second plate.

* * *

They eat their meal, talk some and flirt so much more.

It's a perfect first date by all means and Rachel grins mischievously as they stand outside her apartment, keys dangling from her fingers as she pushes the door open.

"Would you like to come in?" 

It's a harmless invitation, even if hazel eyes don't look so sure of it, lips falling into a mirroring expression as the blonde steps closer to her. "Sure, why not?" Quinn murmurs with a simple shrug and coy smile.

But the atmosphere is charged with boiling heat, just simmering under their steps as they enter the apartment and find themselves alone in the extended space.

Lights off, the wine still lingering on their lips, just their breathing disrupting their quietness.

 _"Fuck it,"_ Rachel whispers, before moving to kiss the blonde, backing her up against the door.

Their lips melt together, hands moving roughly against clothes and it's a fire that appears as Rachel opens her mouth to search for warm wetness with her own tongue.

"What about- going slow?" Quinn murmurs hotly against her skin, hands against her hips, starting to kiss down her neck. It makes Rachel sigh as she threads fingers through blonde locks of hair.

"I wanna _fuck_ you," the brunette whines and she gasps hotly as she feels the hot tongue against her skin, teeth scraping it and she really doesn't think when she is horny, huh?

"Let me _fuck_ you then, _baby,"_ the blonde whispers sexily into her ear, licking the shell of it, hands moving to grasp her ass.

And it's like a bucket of cold water finds her as she moves back, putting a distance between their bodies as she blinks at the blonde.

"What _did_ you just say?" 

"That I want to, _uhm, fuck you?"_

And the blonde's face is completely red, she can see it with the light from the balcony window, her eyes are completely dilated, an expression of total confusion there.

But the performer can only stare with more confusion as her mind conjures _Candy_ and the same words, the same sensual tone on her voice, it - it's -

 _"Sorry,"_ Rachel dismisses, shaking her head to herself and the blonde too, she really is starting to become a mess comparing them both. "I don't know what's getting into me," she continues stepping back to put a hand to her forehead, looking for a fever or another explanation to her own erratic behavior.

"It's - fine," Quinn dismisses with a sympathetic smile, but her eyes seem guarded and, apparently, the mood is completely _fucking_ ruined now. "I just thought..." she trails awkwardly.

"Yeah," the brunette admonishes, and being an ostrich sounds particularly tempting at the moment.

Just putting your head in a hole and evading an awkward situation, _yeah,_ Rachel would love to have that possibility now.

"You know, I should go," Quinn says and it's the final nail into the coffin of what could've been an enjoyable ending to their date.

Way to go, Rachel, what a champ!

"Text me when you get home," Rachel mutters. She watches with a pained expression as the blonde opens the door, waves at her, and then disappears. _"Text me when you get home?_ What the _fuck_ is wrong with me?" Rachel whispers to herself as she shakes her head, hands into her hair. "This is why we are single!" 

* * *

Giving a long explanation to Quinn about her strange behaviour seems like the harder route to take as Rachel finds herself texting the only other person who would read her this late.

_I'm SO stupid._

Her head rests against the pillow and her iPhone vibrates with two new texts.

_Candy: Need to know the context to this claim before agreeing_

_Candy: Also, hey baby_

And the _baby_ definitely doesn't help her predicament.

_Had a date with the woman I told you about and committed a royal screw up :(_

The reply takes longer to come and when it does it makes Rachel frown as she moves the screen closer to her face.

_Candy: did you burn her house down?_

_No wtf why is that even an option on your mind._

_Candy: read a news article about it once._

_Candy: anyway, if it's not THAT bad, then it's pretty easy to fix it_

Rachel rolls her eyes, before texting back.

_easy to say, I bet you make ppl fall at your feet with that sensual voice of yours_

She stands from her bed, discarding her clothes to get into her pajamas and the pout is inevitable as her mind reminds her, she could have been naked now.

Begrudgingly, the performer gets into bed, picking up her phone to see the new messages.

_Candy: not really_

Rachel scoffs but keeps reading.

_Candy: in fact, today I lived a situation that completely trashes that idea_

_what happened?_

And she waits with attention as the dots appear and then the message comes.

_Candy: can't tell you, it's pretty embarrassing_

Rachel rolls her eyes again.

_I'm pretty sure the woman I went out won't ever talk to me again, how bad can yours be anyway_

She moves to check her emails and with interest, her brow moves as one labelled _important_ stands out from the rest.

Someone wants to represent her.

"Oh, my," Rachel mutters, her mouth falling open and her hand moves to her lips as she reads over the mail.

Basically, they saw her performing on stage, were fastly impressed by her, and now want to have her as their client.

"I'm becoming a star," she sings loudly with an excited grin as she does a happy dance on her bed, all with air punches and jumps.

Rachel settles back onto the bed and lets out a happy sigh, before clicking onto her messages.

She can reply to that email by the morning.

_Candy: I was about to have intimacy with someone and said the wrong thing_

"What?" Rachel mutters with furrowed brows. Now, she isn't horny or drunk to see things where they aren't and this can't be a coincidence.

_someone? did you go out on a date too?_

Worrying her lip is the only thing that keeps her from screaming as Rachel moves her leg anxiously up and down on the bed, waiting for a reply.

_Candy: yes_

"Okay, okay, calm down," the brunette repeats as her eyes widen significantly, her heart hammering. "It's a Friday night, many people go out on dates today." But her fingers seek for more as she texts quickly back.

_oh? that's nice, had a nice time?_

_Candy: before I cowardly ran away from the scene? yeah pretty much._

And the gasp that leaves her mouth could probably be heard all the way back to her hometown over _Ohio._

 _"Candy is Quinn,"_ Rachel yells, shaking her head violently, rereading the words over and over as the pieces fall like a puzzle before her eyes and she stands from the bed with a jump.

And then she thinks about nights talking and laughing, endless degrees, the wit, the charm.

Both women aren't similar, they are the same _fucking_ person.

"Oh my - _Quinn is Candy."_

* * *

**Author's Note:**

> and DUN DUN DUN - what will happen now?
> 
> second chapter, coming right up!


End file.
